Summer and that

Summer: DENIED

Well, the dream of endless sunny days and ice cream was again halted by the British weather being most uncharitable, but I wouldn’t have got to see much of it had it been belting out of the sky (sun, not ice cream. But imagine that…) as I have been gallivanting about working and generally not sleeping in my own bed. Not in a slaggy way I hasten to add. Chance would be a fine thing. ANYWAY, here is what I did and where I went this past couple of months since I last managed to scrawl an update:

Party for MAC make up; Devonshire Club; Rome; Flashpoint Festival; Latitude Festival (Rave Karaoke); G-A-Y; Birthday parties; djing dressed as a Disco Boxer (I appreciate this makes NO SENSE); many a wedding reception set; more birthday parties; Soho HouseEdinburgh; ONE DAY HOLIDAY IN SOUTHWOLD (go me, etc); Barbican; oh, more weddings; Birmingham to child mind (am the best aunt everrrrrr); Leeds Festival (Rave Karaoke); Edinburgh AGAIN.

It’s been fun. I have been to new cities, towns and venues and had all manner of cakes. So that kind of makes up for the ice cream / sun shortage. Besides, it were baking in Rome. One isn’t complaining mind.

In september, am here:

FRIDAY 1ST – NOTTING HILL ARTS CLUB 10-2

SATURDAY 2ND – WEDDING AT HIX

FRIDAY 8TH – RAZZMATAZZ, BARCELONA

SATURDAY 9TH – ME DAD’S BIRTHDAY. Not working obvs. He can’t afford me. (he can)

THURSDAY 14TH – BIMA AWARDS PARTY

FRIDAY 15TH – G-A-Y

SATURDAY 16TH – WEDDING IN CAMDEN

THURSDAY 21ST – SUMMER PARTY, PICTUREHOUSE CENTRAL

FRIDAY 22ND – OSEA ISLAND 

SATURDAY 23RD – PRIVATE BRUNCH, SEA CONTAINERS

THURSDAY 28TH – RAVE KARAOKE, THE CURTAIN

SATURDAY 30TH – WEDDING, CLARKENWELL

In between I shall be worrying about Rita’s current storyline in Coronation St and enjoying the new GBBO. Am so glad it’s not rubbish.

As always, Twitter is my latest-up-to-date-what-I’m-doing-and-djing-and-where. But mainly it’s just telly talk. I love telly

Ok bye

 

2017 and that

Hello

Have been terribly tardy of late with the updates, sorry to anyone who is actually arsed.

Anyhoo, had a v busy December what with Christmas parties in their full swing and squeezed in a trip to Barcelona at the start of the month, as well as er, Bournemouth, but both were work not pleasure. Although, really, my work IS pleasure, especially when it’s by the seaside. Then it was actual Christmas so didn’t do nuffink work wise until NYE. But I don’t have to explain myself. You’re not the boss of me.

Before I quack on, must alert your ears and eyes to this LATEST PODCAST . This time on Anna Greenwood Likes to Talk, I talk to Zoe McNulty, a fierce fitness force, body confidence expert and all round excellent person. She is the perfect antidote to the January dieting / self hate yawn that is shoved in our face at this time of year and will make you put down the green smoothie, pick yourself up and learn how to WORK IT. She runs School of Strut which teaches women how bring some love to their chastised thighs, learn some amazing dance moves and have a right old LOL. Check her out here and listen HERE

Now to disco matters. I was kindly asked back to play the wondrous SouthBank Centre for their Vintage NYE party, which was just marvs. It was ace as ever and my dress was increds. I also managed to ruin it due to flailing limbs which are my signature dance move. WELL DONE ANNA. See before and after shots here:

   BEFORE
DURING
AFTER / DISASTER

(Mine hair etc)

Onto January larks:

W Does BrunchW Hotel – Every Sunday

Put your feet up, pop the slippers on and sink back into the sofas of the deluxe W Lounge as you are served up a Sunday sensation of food and drink with music from me! 12-4pm every Sunday, book in here 

Saturday Soiree – Soho House, Saturday 14th January

Shimmying my way up the stairs to the top of 76 Dean Street, shall be playing my decrepit vinyl and no doubt forgetting to take the covers off my needles as I am such a pro. 9pm – 1am

My Birthday – Monday 16th January

Same day as Kate Moss. Can guarantee hers will be 1000000000000x more fun than mine. I AM FINE WITH THAT.

G-A-Y – Friday 20th January

Start of my new monthly residency at London’s pop mecca. SQUEAL 11pm – 4am NON STOP BANGERS

Soho House – Thursday 26th January 

Thursday is the new Friday! Come and find out for yourselves at snazzy 76 Dean Street Soho House  10pm-1am

H&M Staff Awards Party – Friday 27th January

You can only come to this if you’re invited obvs, but you know, it’s my world ergo I shall spout about my carry on as I please.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Have a dreadful feeling there are other things I have forgotten. But this might be dreamt events masquerading as facts. This wouldn’t be the first or last time. Oh well. Shall update here / Twitter as and when I wake in the night in an anxious cold sweat about missed gigs etc

BYE

 

 

 

 

 

SEPTEMBER DISCO GO-GO

I would like some of these please

Hiya

I played at a pop up launch for Guilty Noodle at Old Street Station last night. It was fun and it was 24 degrees outside, thus naturally a heck of a lot hotter underground and combined with fake tan blocking ones pores and a heavily sequinned kimono jumpsuit, it was like working out in one of those sweat suits that people do for extreme rapid weight loss. A more glamorous looking one in theory, but in reality, just as much of a sorry soggy mess.

So, lesson is don’t wear a heavy sequinned article when whirling around playing records underground. Unless you like the sweaty look. I don’t mind it when I am dans le gym, I am just sorry everyone else had to experience it.

I did a lol-ful party last week in Picturehouse Central. THAT’S A NICE VENUE. A disco in a cinema (ok, member’s bar) is a very good thing. I would like to do more please.

This month workwise I am doing THIS:

A wedding in the Cotswolds, Saturday 10th September

Soho House, Friday 16th September

G-A-Y (S-C-R-E-A-M!!!), Friday 23rd September

Razzmatazz, Barcelona Friday 30th September

Aaaand, W Does Brunch at the best Hotel ever, W London every Sunday 12-4pm

There may be some other things popping up, so have a look at my Twitter as that’s where the latest hot disco chat can be found. Amongst outpourings from my tiny mind.

BYE

 

Hotter than July

July: SURE BABES

Although we’re only on the second day of the month as I type, many things can be hotter than this July. A cup of tea left out for a couple of hours, a faulty boiler, my freezing cold heart… God I always harp on about the weather. ‘Tis fundamental to our culture in this septic isle it seems. ANYWAY, back to the razzle dazzle disco business of which I should be quacking about as my life is non-stop exciting GLAMMA 24/7 of course.

After returning to London a weary muck-splattered sequinned soldier from my disco marathon at the muddiest Glastonbury EVER (true facts) on Monday – proving a touch more than a challenge for a person with a low tolerance for any kind of dirt – was unexpectedly smacked back to reality by hosting Old Queen’s Head always-LOLZ pop quiz, then playing records post-cabaret show at the beautiful Bloomsbury Ballroom last night. A welcome bounce back to be honest, otherwise I would have just sat on the sofa staring / got lost on Mail Online / despaired over the state of the WORLD etc. Re BB,  the show runs until the end of this month – you can find out more about it by clicking on these words.

Here be me dates this month

Sundays – all of them – W Does Brunch, W Hotel

The best way to spend Sunday, I promise. And I never lie.  A three course brunch of foodie delight awaits as you recline on sofas, pop on your complimentary slippers and spend your Sunday in a luxurious state of pampered bliss as the ever excellent W staff attend to your every dining and drinking need. They might just plump up your cushions if you ask nicely. I’m on disco duty behind the decks with a more soulful set as appropriate for a Sunday when ears can be a little delicate and in need of gentle reviving. 12-4pm, book in here

Friday 8th July – Razzmatazz, Pop Bar

Back in Barcelona so soon! Que bueno! Playing at crackers o’clock in the morning to a room of ridiculously fun people. Razz rules. As does Barcelona. CAN. NOT. WAIT. Info here!

Saturday 9th July – Private Party, Richmond

(easy) Jetting back for a private party in Richmond where all the deer live (it is a party for people not deers, to be clear). (But imagine playing at a deer’s birthday party…)

Friday 15th July – Wedding, Cotswolds

Providing the entertainment for a couple’s ding dong day in England’s glorious countryside.

Saturday 16th July – RAVE KARAOKE, Latitude Festival

Rave Karaoke makes its debut at one of the country’s BEST festivals. OI OI! Seriously, this place is MAGIC. Am in the cabaret tent at 7pm for a pre-sunset singing rave UP! Tickets / stuff here

Saturday 23rd July –  Soho House, 76 Dean St

Playing at the top of the house 9pm – 1am. I bloody love this place

Friday 29th July – RAVE KARAOKE, Kendal Calling

Back in banging Cumbria for the excellent Kendal Calling. Such a top festival in a truly breathtaking part of the world. Am in the House Party House (it is a house, promise) at 7pm to start their Friday night partying in super neon style. Tickets / info here 

Saturday 30th July – RAVE KARAOKE, Guilty Pleasures, KOKO

It’s been a while… bringing the bangers to my old stomping ground, the unstoppable Guilty Pleasures. Hosting the top bar and perhaps gracing the stage if there’s any glow sticks left… tickets / info here

 

That’s it for now. Follow me on Twitter for last minute additions / non-important information if you really really want

Flaming June

Missing: This yellow guy

In the metropolis, June so far has been nothing like flaming. Flaming MISERABLE maybe, but closer to February weather wise than the sunshine smacked ideal we have in mind when we step into summer. However, it’s only three days young so perhaps one should lay off with the hating.

Instead, here’s some gigs I’m doing this month:

LAST NIGHT (2nd June) Brand Republic Digital Awards, Hilton Bankside

It was LOLZ

SUNDAY 5TH, 12TH & 19TH JUNE – W DOES BRUNCH, W Hotel, Leicester Square

The best way to spend Sunday – super luxe, amazing food, sofas, slippers, papers and me bringing you music to soothe, revive and drink a bottomless Bloody Mary to. 12-4pm every Sunday BOOKING / INFO

WEDNESDAY 8TH JUNE – H&M Oxford Circus – Festival Collection Launch

12-4pm am sountracking your shop for a limited edition collection of festival tinged get ups. I will be sporting one meself

SATURDAY 11TH JUNE – H&M Oxford Circus  – Festival in a Box

H&M are teaming up with Field Day for a one off festival in store. Am playing some hedonistic sunshine (PLEASE) sounds 12-4pm

WEDNESDAY 15TH JUNE – SPEED DUETTING, Lucky Voice Islington

I am hosting this speed dating/ duetting night of sweet sweet music. SCREAM! Read my excitable post about it here or the calmer Lucky Voice site version here 

FRIDAY 17TH JUNE – Soho House Dean St

Weekend is go! Join me on the top floor for some Friday night FUN. 9pm -1am

SUNDAY 19TH JUNE – Pop Quiz, Hornsey Town Hall

Bringing my 10000% LOLZ trashular-spectacular Pop Quiz to this amazing venue for the first time. Part of Crouch End festival, so yummy mummies and chai lattes a-plenty. 7pm start

THURSDAY 23RD – SUNDAY 26TH JUNE – Glastonbury Festival, William’s Green 

I’m baaaaaaaack! SQUEAL! Playing a mammoth set for four days in that magical musical land. Can. Not. WAIT.

 

Hope to see you at one, some or ALL

Bye bye

Hostess with the Mostess

Mostess IS a word.

Alongside djing, I do a spot of hosting. Quizzes, (Rave) Karaoke and the odd cabaret show. Am doing 2 x turns of thus this week. First up, Karaoke!

This Thursday 12th May at the marvellous 76 Dean Street Soho House, will be hosting Pop Masters Karaoke from 9.30pm for all the show offs of Soho to belt out some bangers. God, I love alliteration. I know it’s quite naff but then, I AM quite naff…

Anyhoo, it’s packed full of pop favourites for nearly-the-weekend fun. It’s free! If you’re a member. So become one quick or find someone who is and come and have a sing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hosting part two is Friday 13th May for the fantastic Alternative Eurovision at the glorious London Wonderground. I LOVE DOING THIS SHOW. It’s my fourth year as compere and it is the MOST fun. Ten top cabaret stars adopt a country from the fine singing union and represent them in their very own original song and style, for Alt Euro GLORY. It’s daft, it’s silly, it definitely contains nudity AND swearing and is the perfect warm up for the real deal on Saturday night as well as being a pretty perfect Friday night out!

GET A TICKET HERE  

DOUZE POINTS POUR MOI

And here’s a lovely piece those people at This Is Cabaret wrote about it. They speak 100% TRUTHS

OTHER NEWS

I went to Barcelona last Friday to play Razzmatazz. It was ACE. Always is. Was home before I knew it and djing up The Shard. That’s not a euphemism, one would never be so coarse. I was djing up at the very top of the Shard. It’s terrifyingly high and the toilets don’t have blinds and it’s like doing a wee in the Thames. If that doesn’t sell it to you, then nothing will.

It’s dead sunny and warm here, hope it is with you. BYE.

Saturday Night Soiree

Am doing a new disco at the splendid 76 Dean St Soho House. It’s on Saturday 16th April.

It’s called Saturday Night Soiree. Here’s some excitable words about it:

Push back the sofas, put on your favourite records and raid the drinks cabinet!

It’s 76’s Saturday Night Soiree!

A social shimmy in the heart of Soho at the top of the House. With Dj Anna Greenwood behind the decks, chi-chi cocktails behind the bar and a gang of merrymakers getting the party into a swing, it’s your new favourite night out. Come kick up your heels and join us for a vol-au-vont and a Babycham. Bottoms up and disco down!

What larks. Plus I play actual records. Vinyl ones that weigh a tonne and possibly are scratched and jump just like in the olden days. Still excellent fun though. An extra dimension to the disco. It’s starts at 9pm and stops at 1am. Then you can carry on in your own living rooms if you fancy. I think you should.

 

BUSY

Hiya. I’ve been a bit busy. Christmas was crackers and it’s all been a bit non-stop since.

Not that one is complaining, besides it’s best not to sit around watching Homes Under the Hammer with a family pack of Doritos, no matter how tempting a prospect this is.

But I have been a bit tardy on the site updates. So here’s some talk on where I’ve been and here’s where I’m going.

Edinburgh for New Year djing for a Guilty Pleasures party. It’s such a smashing city and everyone is super nice. On the way up there, fellow performers and lovely boys, Hot Gusset befriended the drinks trolley men and managed to neck about 40 mini bottles of vodka. Straight men love a gaggle of gays cooing over them, even if it is just for their liquor. They don’t need to know the truth, why spoil it? We were in First Class. We were quite excited. We’re a bit sad.

Look here’s Edinburgh (I don’t have any pictures of the party, this’ll have to do).

Then I’ve just been working in London doing Christmas parties (IN JANUARY??? etc) for Hiton Park Lane and Halcyon Gallery at Little House. I’m so Mayfair me. (I get the bus home).

W Does Brunch continues at London’s super spangly W Hotel every Sunday – come join us, it’s such a treat. I don’t play music too loudly as one’s ears can be a bit sensitive on said day  and there’s no Norwegian death metal in my playlist. Well not for now, who knows about the future. I may turn to the dark side.

Here’s a picture of what you get at Brunch. SO pretty and SO good!

 

As well as Little House, I’ve been at Shoreditch House and the the mothership, Soho House. That was good as I haven’t played there for aaages. It’s super fun on Fridays.

Went to see 12 Years a Slave and cried and have had terror dreams since. Should have gone to see American Hustle. Them wigs wouldn’t give one the terrors. Unless they started talking or dancing. That would be quite frightening, but also quite entertaining.

And today it is the Chinese New Year. Kung hey fat choy! It’s the year of the horse, my birth year incidentally, so no pressure, but DON’T LET ME DOWN. Year of the snake was a right cow. So in light of this, here’s where I’ll be the next few weeks of this new year:

Friday 31st January

Shoreditch House, in the Library where they make fancy drinks 12-3am

Saturday 1st February

H&M Oxford Circus during the day – not shopping, but djing – then playing an 18th birthday party that night. I haven’t been to an 18th since I was 18. I won’t behave like I did then though. Mainly because I am the help. It wouldn’t go down well.

Sunday 2nd February

W Does Brunch!

Wednesday 6th February

Quizzically Challenged, best / worst of 2013 at the Phoenix Cavendish.

Yeah we’re a bit late to the party, but we’re working on the Chinese calendar, rather than Gregorian. Trash, bang, wallop of a quiz of telly, celebs, adverts, films and all other hi-brow subjects. Expect HILARIOUS questions and quite rubbish prizes (and a couple of good ones if you’re lucky.) Starts 7pm

 Thursday 7th February

The Vaults, Waterloo. It’s a party for the Vaults Festival (which launched on Thursday 30th and I indeed played there too). I’m on 10.30pm – 12.30am. You can see a show beforehand and stay for a disco. There was some home made quiche and soup last night if you fancy a snack. They also had tequila with the worm in it, if you prefer tiny insect food in a lake of alcohol and horror headache.

Friday 8th February

Razzmatazz, Barcelona. Back in my favourite city in the world with the best crowd in town. So much fun. I’m in the Pop bar (natch) at 3am until the sun comes up and the man outside is selling sandwiches to the departing revellers.

Sunday 9th February

W Does Brunch! Then later that night,  Shoreditch House from 9pm.

Saturday 15th February

Silent Night, the Vaults

Can’t seem to stay away from this venue. This time it’s one of those parties where you play to a crowd wearing headphones and they listen to whichever dj they choose. Well, of which ones are playing obvs. Never done one of those discos before, imagine it’s quite amusing watching people dancing to different things. And possibly out of time to what I’m playing. Although I may be dancing out of time to that too. Or I might listen to someone else if I’m rubbish.

Sunday 16th February

W Does Brunch!

Ok that’s enough for now. Will add more dates as and when. Naturally this will be the first place updated. (It won’t be – follow me on Twitter for that. It’s mainly nonsense but occasionally I self-promote. I don’t RT praise though. Ick)

Bye!